Vicky, can I be the first to say, "Thanks, but no thanks."

The new Victoria's Secret models all gathered together for this photo in GQ or Vogue or something in an attempt to convince us that we don't secretly wish it was 2004 again. Well, Vicky, you tramp, it's not working. Is this some cruel joke? Are you trying to confuse me with all this blonde emaciation? Well, it's not working. We all know you can't have angels without Heidi Klum. I usually agree that there's no such thing as too skinny, but these faces look like skeletons. I just signed up with Sally Struthers to send 10 cents a day and feed all these chicks. Geez, this is so sad to me. Not only is this one of the most tell tale signs I'm old balls, but it rips out the heart that has belonged to the German siren temptress since as far back as I can remember. I don't want to give up on Victoria, but if she continues to betray me, I'm afraid I'll be left with no choice.

Rachel Mcadams gives her best, "Trey, please love me" pose.

After wedding crashers, ok ok ok...actually it was actually after I watched The Notebook and cried for an hour, that I fell in total love with Rachel Mcadams. What? How you could you not cry at that beautiful coming-of-age story of forbidden love, destiny, loyalty and tragedy. Noah spent his entire life trying to prove himself and win her love. I digress. The point is that Rachel McAdams is a ROCKET. Sure, she's a little pale and sinewy, but so was Fiona Apple in her Criminal video in 1997 and that didn't stop me from wanting to have sex with her now did it. I'm essentially hoping Rachel keeps making terrible movies like this one with Harrison Ford because with bad box office performances come fewer roles, and with fewer roles comes roles requiring nudity. That's one of the most basic Hollywood algorithms...just after summer blockbuster roles in Transformers and obligatory sex with directors...not naming names (COUGH) Megan Fox.

The Sad State of Affairs in Arizona

As a student of politics and political science, I am amazed as to what human rights issues become bogged down in political partianship.

In recent months, the fate of Arizonians awaiting organ transplants have been held hostage in the hands of Arizona Governor Jan Brewer (R).

It is the position of Governor Brewer that the current status of the Arizona state budget has "forced" Governor Brewer to no longer fund Arizona Transplant Coverage.

I do not believe that one American citizen can deny the fact that our country continues to be in serious financial distress and our state and federal governments are struggling to find ways to deal wth these problems.

In recent times, the political establishment of Arizona have offered proposals and ideas which, in all Christian charity, have given the rest of the county moments of pause and confusion. But Governor Brewer's decision to condemn the fates of transplant patients to death crosses all lines of social morality and political decency. As of the date of this posting two patients awaiting life saving transplants have died at the hands of Governor Brewer. I wonder how many more will have to die because of Governor Brewer's politics?

Governor Brewer's official bio states that she is a member of the Christ Lutheran Church. To the best of my recollection, the Lutheran Church accepts the commandment that "Thou Shall Not Kill." I wonder how Governor Brewer reconciles this fact. One of the chief talking points of the Republican Party has been their dedication for the "Right to Life." I wonder how Governor Brewer and the Arizona Republican Party reconciles this fact.

For those families who have lost their loved ones due to the politics of Governor Jan Brewer, I offer this suggestion to them: Send the bill for the funerals of your loved ones to her.

Has someone been dippin' into poppa's meth cabinet...?

Jaime Pressly, star of "My Name Is Earl," was arrested on suspicion of drunken driving Wednesday night after a traffic stop in Santa Monica, L.A. Now reports.

The 33-year-old actress -- arrested at 11:36 p.m. and booked around 2:30 a.m. -- was released Thursday morning on $15,000 bail, higher than the typical $5,000 bond.

No accident was involved, police said. Though Pressly's blood-alcohol content was not public, TMZ said bail can be set at $15,000 in DUI cases when the BAC is measured at higher than 0.15. The legal limit is 0.08.

There was a time when Jaime Pressly was on fire. Now is not that time. There are a couple of certainties in life. One, you can never underchick. Meaning, you simply can't be a 7 and date a 5, but that's neither here, nor there. Two, you just can't do meth. Meth makeovers are the worst. If you think alcohol is bad over the course of a lifetime, check out a meth billboard because those will be certain to leave an impression...and those guys do it over a 2 year period. Jaime might blow a .19, but I can assure you, based on that face, meth has been a dietary staple. In fact, one of my cousins bought from her lab last Tuesday...True Story.

Jennifer Aniston is so awesome...and by awesome, I mean heinous and insufferable.

Jennifer Plainiston was hammered last night at the People's Choice Awards. Shocker. If you asked begged bribed threatened 37 men to accompany you to the awards, and they turned you down, you'd be shotgunning champagne too. I almost feel sorry for her, but then I think about her plain jane, run-of-the-mill looks, her 15 million a movie paychecks, her inability to keep a man without crying about it for five years, and I remember how much I despise her to the depths of my soul. Seriously, just today I saw 4 girls in Atlanta 6x's hotter than Jennifer Aniston's plastic surgery Frankenstein ass. No joke. If I were Brad Pitt, I would've been willing to sex up razor blades after being married to Aniston for four years. If you don't understand why he left that insufferable walking organism of desperation for Angelina Jolie, get a hotel in Atlanta around the 10th of October because you're gay, and that's Pride Week.

Amazing story, amazing video.

If you're reading this on facebook go this link to see the video. www.exposedandnaked.blogspot.com

This is a recent viral video of a homeless man in Ohio with a strange gift. This video is almost hard to believe. If you didn't know better, you'd think that the audio was altered. Nonetheless, this is a truly great story. On a lighter note, why in the eff would you live in Ohio if you homeless. I mean, why would you live in Ohio period, but especially if you're homeless. It should be pretty obvious to determine when you see a homeless man if he's just homeless, or he's mentally insane. Unless you're homeless south of Orlando, you're bat shit crazy.



Here's part of the article posted on foxnews.com:

Ted Williams, whose deep baritone and plight have made him an online video sensation, was first contacted Wednesday by the NBA team during an interview on a local Columbus radio station.

"We'd like to offer you full-time work with the Cleveland Cavaliers, as well as Quicken Loans Arena. On top of it, because we know you're a person trying to get up on your feet, Quicken Loans is actually offering to pay a mortgage on a home," team spokeswoman Tracy Merek said on the show.

The 53-year-old father of nine tells Fox8.com that he will take the job offer.

"That lady offered me a full-time job with the Cavs and then something about the mortgage of a home? I'm going with that! Out of all the offers I've had, and I've had quite a few, I'll be working in Cleveland, Ohio," Williams told the website.

Macaulay's deal with devil just expired...

News broke today that surprised everyone, Mila Kunis and Macaulay Culkin broke up after 7 years of being together...and by surprised I mean, not surprised. I think she woke up one day and realized that over the last three years she has taken Hollywood by storm and has become a leading lady and meanwhile, her boyfriend's highlight was 20 years ago when he applied aftershave without facial hair and screamed intot he camera. Mila Kunis is so hot that she came to this country from Ukraine, learned english by watching The Price is Right, has only been in show business for a short time, and she's already 30x's more successful than Lindsay Lohan. Macaulay can live longer than those Asian dudes with the hairy moles and he'll look back at these 7 years as the greatest time of his life.